Monday, March 13, 2017

Annoying Things About the Paranormal with James Paradie: My First Lesson with Lying Clients

Back in 2013, I was working on a Scared Sheetless book where I went into detail about my start in publishing in newspapers and went more into detail about all the paranormal investigation cases. Reading it now, I also went detail about crap people who don't know me wouldn't care about anyway and even made me go, "When the hell do I talk about spirits and investigating. This guy's book sucks! Oh, wait. It's me. ... It still sucks." I give more details on cases, because all the newspapers I ever wrote for allowed only 800 words, although this sneaky guy could convince the editors to allow a little bit more. I was that entertaining ... or so I would like to think.

One case I went into much further detail was Where Evil and Innocence Reside. It was an interesting case for a few reasons:

1. It was one of the more intense investigations NEPI has had (in my opinion).

2. I learned a valuable lesson to NOT put the street name in the article, because people kept on bugging the crap out of Anthony (the leader of NEPI) about where exactly was the location.

3. My first lesson in lying clients.

And that is the discussion of this post. Lying clients. I think all paranormal investigation teams have dealt with them and always will. NEPI has dealt with a few. One of which I will publish at a later time in a part 2 of this column.

I will keep the names confidential, mostly because it's been a long time and I forget their names anyway. But this is from Scared Sheetless, the book, which will probably never see the light of day anyway. I mean, who wants to read a book where you can read everything for free online?

Anytime I add something from the present that wasn't in the book originally, I will add parentheses and Present all in bold. Mostly you'll see me arguing with my past self, which is bullying ... past me can't defend himself.

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Crazy, But That's How It Goes

Those Who Seek 15 Minutes of Fame ... Or Need to Seek a Mental Hospital

Not all investigations are walks in the park and the clients are sane. We've had two or so that we felt like turning away and going home. Some have been a real waste, while some, although being lied to, proved to be one of the most haunted places we've ever been to. But regardless, lies are a part of this game as they are in any other, and we've had our fair share of them.

Now, you shouldn't go into any clients’ house automatically assuming they are telling a fib, because that just shows ignorance.

(Present: I disagree past me. I don't think it's ignorance to go in with a skeptic attitude. This was around the time I was a hardcore believer in the paranormal and you couldn't tell me otherwise. A lots changed with my views on the paranormal since 2013. I'll go into greater detail about my thoughts on skeptic investigators in another column someday.) 

You don’t like someone telling you they don’t believe you right? Show the same respect toward the clients. (Present: I do, however, agree with showing respect towards clients.) We expect the same from our clients to not tell us a fib, but it's happened before to us. Clear your mind, read this, and see how good a fib can get.

(Present: I then paste the original Where Evil and Innocence Reside article I wrote. However, with one change, the names of the "guests" were redacted from the original article. I explain why, now.) 

You're probably thinking that house had to be a messed up investigation. Really it was, because everything that was said in that article really did happen---the evidence at least. We got had by two liars; you remember? They had two great names, Name Removed 1 and Name Removed 2. I really don't know if they were juniors or not. All terrible jokes aside, (Present: It was terrible then and now) these two* are punks, and I don't give punks any billing what so ever. At first I did, but a few months later when I put the story in the White Mountain Shopper, I got an e-mail from the actual owner of the house who spilled the beans on these two.

*(Present: I don't think one of them was malicious. I do think he was in on it, but he seemed more of a lackey than anything. He may have been kind of slow too. He was nice and some of the members of NEPI knew him. I think the other guy, the leader, was a real ass though. You'll see why in a second.) 

One thing I left out (name removed number 1) who had nothing better to do than to make himself look big and bad. I left out some things in that article, because some things are better left unsaid, especially in a public newspaper. One thing was he was totally disrespectful during the investigation; he had to keep on yelling derogatory remarks about the owner's husband who had then passed away; he was talking about doing stuff in the house that no man should say in the present of the living or the dead, because it doesn't pertain to the investigation. This guy just had a jolly for making himself look like a tough guy.

Not only that, but the so called "brother" (Name Removed 2) wasn't even his brother, it was his friend. When I did the interview with them outside they were telling me some stuff they originally didn't tell Anthony in the walkthrough, so my guess is that they were thinking this stuff up as we went along. Why do that?

Thankfully, I wasn't the only one that got sucked into this class A account of bullshit. Everything sounded so good though and it was my first investigation where things sounded nice and creepy and that to me is the most fun investigation you can have. Do I think the house was still worth it even after all the lies? Yeah. As I said, all the evidence we caught was legit. (Present: Legit meaning we THINK - remember I blur the line between believer and skeptic now) But now that I think of it, during the glass swirling session Name Removed 1 and 2 may have been doing a little more pulling that I thought.

A few months later, we did a follow up investigation of the house and the owner of the place told us the story about how these men lied to us about everything. There was no murder in the house, there was no bones found in the basement, they weren't brothers, the father that name removed 1 kept on bashing, only knew him for a day and the guy made it seem like they knew and were at each other’s throats for years.

I also received a call from Nikki giving me some helpful advice not to give away the address again. I said the street name, not the complete address, but still apparently someone was actually calling Anthony and Nikki's house asking them where this place was and seemed pretty obsessive about it. I'm obsessed with Harley Quinn, but you don't see me calling her house, asking her probing questions. But she's in comic books, so she isn't real, but that was a bad example. (Present: Yeah, it was. I left out the part where Joker kills me.) 

It's okay though, everything is a lesson in knowing to not do it again. Being lied to is never fun, no matter who you are, but dealing with someone who has a few problems is no fun either.

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Present me for now on. I never saw either of them again, or haven't thus far. I did bump into the leader (as I call him) a few weeks later after the investigation. This was before the owner of the house contacted me and told me about everything. Later I would find out he was arrested for abusing his girlfriend. Real stand up guy. Dick. 

But that was just one incident. There is another and this one is far more interesting than the one you just read. That one's coming soon, so look out for it. 

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Related Reading Material for Annoying Things About the Paranormal: 

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