Monday, September 28, 2015

It's a Sad Time in the Paranormal Word by Chad Stambaugh

    By now many of you have heard the news of Mark and Debbie Constantino. This is a horrific tragedy that has befallen on two of our own. My thoughts go out to the families of Debby and Mark. We are all grieving and grappling with this, but I can't begin to imagine how they feel at this moment.

     Everyone on the outside thought they were the “Perfect Couple”. Well obviously, things were not as many of us thought and I'm not condoning what happened at all! I had the pleasure to work with both of them a couple of times and it was very interesting how they handled EVP sessions. In fact, my team, 11th Hour Paranormal actually uses some of the very techniques that Mark and Debbie taught. However, there are too many people in the paranormal field that are coming up with assumptions as well as those outside of the field that what happened was demonic in nature.

     While these two people were paranormal investigators, what happened here was not "Demonic!" Yes, there are those out there that want this to be so, but it's not. What happened here is what's called "Domestic Violence." Pure and simple. Domestic Violence is a heinous crime. My thoughts and experiences of living through this and witnessing this myself as a child is probably one of the most mentally and physically silent tragedies that any human being can possibly go through. Domestic violence by many is a learned trait that goes down through generations until one can hopefully break the cycle.

     Here's why crying demon in the deaths of the Constantino's is a problem. It obscures the very real, human issue of domestic violence. All said and done, domestic violence is horrific, mentally and physically and there is no excuse whether there are mental health issues or not on part of the perpetrator. Help is out there for those that grow a pair to address their offending behavior and change their ways. No sympathy for Mark from me. Especially as he took the easy way out after what he did to Debbie.

     Most of us only saw the “Public Figure” or “Persona” of these two people. But very few saw what was going on behind the scenes. I won’t say their names here, but a few people in the field were very close to these two people and they knew the truth behind the happy and go lucky appearances of these two.

     They knew first hand that Mark was very abusive to Debbie for a long time. Finally, she had had enough. She filed for divorce in Early September. She was happy and trying to move on with her life. Then for reasons only Mark can give you, he kidnapped her, beat her badly and was arrested shortly after. Then, weeks later, he then does the same thing and kills her. Some people out there are saying that she made Mark do it. That she had to do something that would make Mark do this.

     Regardless of what she had purportedly done or had not done, she didn't deserve to die. He also killed her roommate and there are some reports of possibly others. Additionally, he shot it out with police then ate his gun. And then today, people are honoring both of them. And I am sickened at people honoring him. Why would you honor an abuser? That makes no intelligent sense.  Honor Debbie for finally having the courage and tenacity to finally stand-up to her abuser and break free from him, even if it was only for a short while. Not Mark.

     And as for the field itself, it has gone to shit. People who hang their entire lives on one thing, tend to lose their shit when they lose that one thing. And everyone wants to be a TV star. Good luck with all that. Part of that reward is getting entirely new psychotic haters to deal with. But I digress from my point of this article.

     Everyone in this field needs to take a good, hard look at themselves. Why are you in the field? What service to your fellow man are you providing? What do you hope to gain? If its fame, trust me, fame ain't all that. It intrudes into your life. It changes how you live, AND not always for the better. I'm talking about people who didn't even know them - or barely knew them, publicly hosting spirit box sessions or posting results of their readings claiming to have reached the deceased.

     This is not only immoral, but unprofessional and utterly reprehensible. And it's completely irresponsible for those of you that wouldn’t know a demon from a tooth-fairy to imply anything "demonic" and that it had something to do with the deaths of Mark and Debbie Constantino. Domestic violence is a very real issue and to try to mask it with something paranormal does a huge disservice to the men and women living within a dangerous, violent environment every day. To me, you’re no better than the West Baptist church people who disturb the funerals of our fallen heroes.

     This is a tragedy, plain and simple. And for the ones in this field trying to contact them, especially right now, this sickens me. Abuse is a bad enough thing and when you mix it with the paranormal, yes it can be fueled by the idiots in it. There is no excuse or sensible reasoning for what you’re doing. You obviously have no morals or sensitivity to common human courtesy and decency.

     Again, this is just not about the paranormal field. Domestic violence happens to ones not even involved in ghost hunting and so this excuse of him having an evil entity from ghost hunting isn't going to fly with me. It’s a worldwide epidemic. In my opinion, more resources need to be put forth to help the women and men who are enduring with this disease every day.

     So in conclusion, I'm going to make this very clear and to the point! You weren't there! You don't know the whole story! There is no scientific/theological proof that demons had anything to do with this incident. There is however, unequivocal proof that this was pure and simple, domestic abuse. This is a lesson. It's a lesson that we never know what goes on behind closed doors. It's a lesson in reaching out to get help and it's a lesson in common decency.

 So I say RIP Debbie and to all the families and friends that are affected by this tragedy the most I pray for your heavy hearts and healing.  As to the rest of you, who are trying to get your 15 minutes of fame, shame on you and you know where you can go. We as a whole have a lot to think about. Let the families grieve. Let the dead rest.

     If you know anyone that is in a bad situation please reach out to them. Offer your love and support and try to get them the help they need. Nearly 3 in 10 women (29%) and 1 in 10 men (10%) in the US have experienced rape, physical violence and/or stalking by a partner and report a related impact on their functioning. 1 in 4 women (24.3%) and 1 in 7 men (13.8%) aged 18 and older in the United States have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime. For more information contact your local Domestic Violence office or call the national hotline at 1-800-799-7233.

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