Personal Blog: Is Suicide the Solution?

Note: This blog is months old. I think I started writing it a few days after the Robin Williams suicide.

Depression is a serious health and mental health concern. Those who have it, already know this and don't need validation from a doctor to be concerned about the health risks it can pose. Knowing from experience, it can certainly put a strain in family relations and create tension in the household. Of course, I come from a household where just saying, "Forget about it" or "Ignore them" is like sprinkling fairy dust and makes all your worries disappear. I am not putting the villain label on my family, but I also don't believe in their thoughts towards depression.

Unless you've been living under the rock for the past few months, you have heard the news that Robin Williams committed suicide. A man with an immense amount of fans, loved ones, and money, who can do such a thing, has boggled peoples minds. How dare he be selfish! They may say. But a lot are not. People have been feeling pity for Robin and wishing there was a way to go back in time and tell him how much he'd be missed. Of course nobody can go back in time. What's done is done and can not be undone. Robin Williams committed suicide due to depression. That's what we know. And like so many actors and actresses who've taken their lives, there will be conspiracy nuts who will say that there was something more to his death than meets the eye. And yes, I know, he was in the early stages of Parkinson's disease. Not what I meant. What I mean is that the nuts will be like, he was really a Soviet Union spy. Yes. The Soviet Union doesn't exist anymore, but you know them nutters.

Don't hate on or think low of those who suffer through depression. It doesn't matter if it's an actor who made everyone smile and laugh or a regular Joe or Jane on the street. We all have issues and some have a harder time dealing with those issues. I, myself, have had depression long since I could remember and as much as I'd love to forget. I think the depression has made me wiser (grumpy as hell, yes, but definitely wiser). I understand where people who think they're hopeless and helpless are coming from.

It's too bad when someone takes their own life in spite of being loved. In the case of Robin Williams, loved by millions. Sometimes the demons win. If you know someone who suffers through depression, don't let their demons win. Help them out; tell them that you love them; let them vent to you. The worst thing you can do is ignore them. The worst thing you can do is tell them they're only doing this for attention. Because you never know. Maybe some people are, but if they're normally very chill people and have a good head on their shoulders, then I would say they're looking for help.

Help today is scarce. It's hard to get help when everything is about medication. The medication sometimes works, but when it don't work, and you don't have any one to talk to, it can be a real bad day ... or month or year. If the pills don't work, here, take more pills. I think the best medicine is talking to people or distracting yourself from what wants to kill you on the inside and sometimes the outside. Like me. I do this for therapy. I write. I go into different worlds that I create inside my mind to get away from everything and everyone. It's the best therapy for me. Pick up a hobby or something to distract yourself. But do something you're happy doing. And a little advice here: Don't watch anything or listen to anything that will just make you more upset. I've learned that the hard way several times. If I'm having a really sad, depressed day, I try to veer away from watching adult oriented movies and watch animated based movies (like How To Train Your Dragon, for example. Hey. Judge all you want. If it makes me feel better, I don't care what people think.)

Have a vent buddy picked out. Someone you know you can talk to about these problems. Don't pick someone who has in the past told you that you're just paranoid or that you need to get over it. Granted, people have their own ways of dealing with depression, but those people need to realize that their ways are not necessarily the right ways for others. I've told many people this (my family -cough-) but it falls on deaf ears. I know the fear with these people is that you will be bugged a lot with this depressed friend. But these people also need to realize that depression is not cured over night. Simply letting them vent to you just gives them one more baby step in feeling better. Maybe letting them vent means they can sleep better at night.

Even though it's good people are really starting to take depression a little more serious, I'm afraid that it's just going to turn into a fad. Much like ALS. Hey, put the villain label on me all you want. The only reason why people jumped on that bandwagon was because people turned it into a game. Granted, it raised a lot of money, but only 20% of that money was actually donated to the cause. Nice, huh? But with Robin Williams committing suicide due to depression and people finally opening their eyes simply because he was a movie star, it's sad. It really is sad. Because depression has been around FOREVER. And it's sad that it takes a movie star, someone you've probably never met in your life, to make you wake up. What about that friend who committed suicide? What about your cousin? Uncle? Etc. Didn't they need help?

This is the problem with our world: we wait until a tragedy happens to notice something. Like people didn't really start jumping on the gay bandwagon until Ellen and various media did stories on these gay teens committing suicide. Now 30 something states allow gay marriage and don't even utter the "F" word or you're fucked (not that F word. The other one. You know the one I'm talking about. Bill and Ted say it a lot.)

But does that mean that we can't start focusing on other people? What? Do we have to wait until a bunch of them kill themselves? There was on quote someone said (I think it was shortly after the gay teen suicide epidemic) and it went like, "We shouldn't be focusing on the dead. We should be focusing on the living." And we should. We honor those who've died with helping those who are dealing with the same issues. But what am I kidding? People are the most cruelest creatures in the world. Telling the general public to be nice and accept everyone for who they are and what faults they have is impossible. People will always be hateful and cruel. They will always hate for no good reason at all, other than, "I just don't like him/her."

What do you do then? You surround yourself with good people. That's it. Block out the bad. Cut it out of your life. It's hard, but I've done it. Granted, I work from home and never leave my house, but ... eh, bad example.

Creepy: In 1976, a film crew went to the haunted house in...

 

SS Note: Hey guys, I have to apologize for the lack of posts lately. I know usually I post quite a few a day, but recently I've been pretty busy. Between editing my book, phone conferences with my editor, and yard work to get ready for winter...I haven't had very much time to be dedicated to this page. 

So, just letting you know that Scared Sheetless is not dead (pun intended) and it may be a little while longer before SS is back up and running to its usual standards again. Thanks for your patience :-D 

Short Story: The Voice by James Paradie

A short little story I wrote just now. For those who are suffering from depression, I advise you not to read this as it won't make your mood any better. But with that said, I hope you enjoy it. I was in the zone. Yes, it's a short story, shorter than my previous two, but I think the message is clear and has a punch! I hope you enjoy it. If you did, press that send button at the bottom. Mucho gracious for those who do.

Rated T for Teen

Got a story? Send it to me at scaredsheetlessncn@hotmail.com and I will give you an e-cookie.

----

The Voice

By James Paradie

 

                I just couldn’t take it anymore. The pain. The mental agony. I wanted out and I wanted it now. For the past five years, I’ve seen doctors, who write me prescriptions to make the pain go away; I’ve been to shrinks, who seem to know all the right answers, but no good solutions; and friends? Don’t get me started on friends. They only need me when they want to grieve about their so called screwed up lives. But when it comes to my time? Where are they? Are they there for me? No. There too busy, or they got better things to do, or they can’t be on the phone long enough to talk me out of blowing my brains out. Do you know what that is like? For people who are supposed to care about you, give up on you, and leave you to rot inside your own brain which acts like a cell from hell itself.

                And the craziest thing is, is that I’ve been depressed without knowing why. That’s the scariest type of depression, if you ask me. Just … everything set’s you off. It makes you explode on the inside. For this, I’ve never known true love. Of course I’ve made love to a woman. But can love be made when the love is only one sided? I loved her, but she didn’t love me. She saw money that I did not have and when she saw that I didn’t have the means for her, she tried to get away. But I kept pulling back, crying in her arms, telling her that I would make it better. She pitied me and kept taking me back. She kept on taking me back, after each argument; until finally, I didn’t hear from her for weeks. I see her leaving the supermarket with a new man. Better looking and looked wealthier, and she acted like she didn’t even know me. How love can be blind and can turn a man loveless. But that’s the least of my problems.

                My main problem is, is that I have a gun to my head. I want to pull the trigger, but I keep waiting. I keep waiting for that voice I used to hear before I would kill myself. That voice that used to assure me that everything is going to be okay. That it’s just a temporary bump in the road. That life will get better; I just need to give it a chance to blossom. But the voice isn’t coming. It’s not even a whimper of don’t. It’s the angry voice inside of me that keeps on telling me to pull the trigger. That no one loves me. That I’m just a shadow of a man. A lost man, with a lost hope of finding solitude in a cold world that is full of fear and greed. A world that doesn’t listen to pleads and that laughs at you.

The world is laughing at me!

It’s mocking me and making me feel like shit. It wants me to die. It wants me to pull the trigger and put an end to it all. But what about your family? Wouldn’t it be selfish to kill myself? What have they done to help me?! The same old rhetoric of, “Just swallow the pain and it will eventually go away.” I tried to swallow, but I hate the taste of it! It tastes like bile and filth.

                The angry voice is getting louder; it’s telling me to just do it. I will feel better. But what if there is no feeling better? What if there is nothing after this? What kind of solace is that? The voice tells me that there will be solace, even if it is just a black void. That I will feel happy.

                Happy.

                It’s just a word now. An emotion my hypothalamus gland ran dry of ages ago. I want to feel happy again. I want to feel like nothing can affect me ever again. I cock the trigger back and by now I’d be crying. But there are no tears…

                Just a smile on my face.

The Dog Killing Bridge

The Dog Killing Bridge
Overtoun Bridge Milton, Dumbarton, Scotland

In my research, all the countless articles I've read, I've realized one thing: every house has a story and every bridge has a story. What I mean is that where there's a haunted house, there's a haunted bridge just around the corner. You either have the woman who is crying over a lost love (Emily's Bridge-Stowe, Vermont) or a bridge where there's at least one dog committing suicide every month since the 1960's...yes, you read correctly. It's no ordinary bridge, a bridge like Emily's Bridge is ordinary in the terms of spirits, but this canine hating bridge struck me odd.

I first read about it off of theinsidegeek.com (a website dedicated to anime, video game/movie reviews, your kids will love it) where they posted an article about the "10 Paranormal and Unexplained Mysteries That Will Leave You Guessing." Great article with ten interesting subjects, but the one that got me interested the most was this bridge that attracts dogs to take their own lives.

The bridge was built by John Campbell White who was better known as Lord Overtoun in 1895 and is right next to the very large Overtoun Mansion (2,000 acres large). Due to both the west side and east side being separated by a waterfall, they built this Victorian bridge to connect each side. The bridge stands 50 feet tall which would be great for the bungee jumping junkies, but it's more known for the depressing amount of dog deaths that have occurred at this bridge. As said before, dogs will climb the parapet wall and jump off the bridge. Of course, mistakes happen, but this bridge has claimed the lives of six-hundred dogs and has claimed only two human lives. What's even stranger is that the dogs who have survived the plunge have come back to try again.

What's even stranger is that all the dogs who have committed suicide have jumped off almost exactly the same spot. Why does this happen though? Some believe, such as the Celtics, that the Overtoun Bridge is a portal between the world of the living and the afterlife and sometimes they cross over. Another theory, which is more logical, is that there's these animals called minks that hang around the bridge. The dogs could sense them since they give away this musty smell, and when they jump onto the ledge, they don't realize the incredible fall they're going to take.

But the bridge has claimed two human lives on record as well. In 1994, a man threw his newborn child off the bridge claiming it was the anti-Christ. After feeling sorrow for the atrocious act of killing his own child, he killed himself on the same bridge. Some say it was the bridge that made him kill his child and himself, where there's others, such as myself, that think the man did it because anyone wouldn't be able to live with themselves after doing something like that. Whatever the case maybe, Overtoun Bridge has claimed more lives of dogs than any other bridge in the world. If you go to the bridge, make sure to have a leash.

Remember: NEPI is still looking for members to join us on future investigations. If you're interested make sure to call Anthony at (603) 444-7142 and become apart of the coolest ghost group around!

Until next time this has been another Scared Sheetless. Make sure to enter my website if you dare for more scares at scaredsheetlessncn.blogspot.com and write me a message! Thanks for reading my fellow graveyard disciples and always remember to keep it scary!

Resources:

http://strangeworldofmystery.blogspot.com/

"Love is in the Air" As well as the Afterlife

"Love is in the Air" as well as the Afterlife
Plymouth State University
Plymouth, New Hampshire

Nothing like a good love story to get the ladies emotions going, but if your a ghost hunter, as myself, there is also nothing better (technically speaking, of course) than a tragedy that has left two lovers searching for each other for ages. Let's explore the legends, as well as ghosts, of Plymouth State University.

First, let's start with the ghost stories that are attached to the university before we go into the historical details;

Mary Lyon was madly in love, but her and her lover kept their relationship in secret by hiding in the tunnels that were built for the students so they wouldn't get cold walking from their dormitories to their classrooms. The tunnel collapsed, killing them both and now they both haunt Mary Lyon Hall and Blair Hall.

Here's what happens: sounds coming from the basement of Mary Lyon Hall; students will hear noises and when they go down to investigate there's nobody down there (students are not allowed in the tunnel and parts of the basement are roped off); Mary Lyon is said to haunt the tunnels where she desperately tries to get to her lover after all these years. Another spirit, who has a more negative reputation, haunts Mary Lyon's Hall; this spirit is said to be malicious and has a certain negative energy about the place and a feeling that something wants them out of there.

In Blair Hall; students will lock the doors, shut the lights off, and leave when they come back the lights are turned on and drawers are pulled open and this is said to be where Lyon's lover haunts. Rowdy students? We can't always blame them.

Another Hall has had a dark past as well, a suicide that has left a young man behind in the land of the living. The young man has been seen before, wearing a jeans and a flannel shirt, floating between floors. People also report seeing objects, such as a punching bag, swaying back and forth as if someone is punching it, but there's nobody there. They also claim to hear balls bouncing and the feeling of being watched, but their not by the living at least.

Here comes the most unfortunate part of all this, since the story is so neat, the legends of the young man in the flannel shirt may be true, but it's time to break the myth: according to my source there has never been a student by the name of Mary Lyon, or if there has, it has gone unnoticed, and the facility is actually named after a highly respected teacher of the same name. Even though the theory of it being a love story between Mary Lyon and someone else is gone, that doesn't mean that the story derives from another love story.

I would like to thank Nick Greenwood for his very informative email regarding the history and what happens in the university.

Other sources: Shadowlands.net

Want to contact me?:

E-Mail: scaredsheetlessncn@hotmail.com
Facebook search: Scared Sheetless or The NEPI Paranormal Experience
Website: http://scaredsheetlessncn.blogspot.com/

James Paradie is a paranormal columnist as well as a paranormal investigator who has been seen in such newspapers as the Northcountry News, Littleton Record, the White Mountain Shopper, and the Trendy Times. His stories can also been seen on paranormalnews.com where he is a regular contributor.